Hi, my name is Kim & I’m a dork. I am a happily married mother of a 9 yr old demon *cough cough*, er daughter. I'm usually reading on my Kindle, on the computer, or watching movies, but I'm usually reading. I'm a sucker for a happy ending. I sing badly & dance worse (only when alone or with the kid). I tend to get songs & movie quotes stuck in my head (mentally inked~get it? hee hee). I try to be a good person, wife & mother, but don’t always pull it off.
I just found out today that I no longer have that wonderful job that I was so excited to get & so desperately needed. Why? Because of security clearance that I needed to have. What could be in my past that is so terrible that might keep me from getting this clearance, you may ask? Am i a terrorist? No! Am I a thief? NO! Am I a threat to any kind of security? NO!!!
The only thing I can guess is that it's my credit, my financial situation (one of the generic reasons on what it could have been). It's a vicious circle, one that I may not be able to get out of. This year has been hell on my finances & my credit rating. I would be able to dig myself out of this hole if I had a job, but I can't get a job (at least this one) because of this fucking hole!
Yes, I plan on spending the rest of the day wallowing in my misery & watching Pirates. Johnny is never a disappointment & never hurts me. It may be better for me to be away from people & soak in my movies anyway.
So, what minimal holiday cheer I may have had has now gone down the toilet.
Snow White has lost her arms & legs. (The missing clothes are courtesy of M.)
We went out of our way to find her & this is how she repays us...this week. I don't know what to do as we just don't have the funds to keep replacing the things she is destroying. And we still can't let her roam free outside...
I suppose I should be thankful, since the rage I am feeling is saving me from the dark hole I was slipping into.
Welcome, once again, to my life. It may not be pretty to look at, but it'll make you feel good about your own (hmm...maybe that should be my new tagline!).
Have you ever felt completely worthless ("Are you tired, rundown, listless? Do you pop out at parties? Are you unpoopular?" Oh, how the mind wanders.) That is the boat I'm in right now. The following is my list of reasons why:
We're broke
We're broke because I couldn't handle the job I've had for almost 10 years anymore
We're broke cuz I'm not helping to bring in the big bucks
We're broke because I don't have enough gold to make cash for gold worth it
I'm a shitty female because I don't have enough gold for cash for gold!
We're broke because I can't people shop
I'm such a shitty female that I can't even shop for people. (I should be able to shop for anything!)
We're broke because I'm not even good enough to be a stripper (ahem *cough cough*, not that I'd actually do such a thing.)
I need to lose weight, but can't seem to. (How the hell am I supposed to strip if I can't lose weight?!)
I'm a terrible housewife. (We need a friggin maid,which we can't get cuz we're broke. This place is a mess!)
Ok, I think y'all get the point. I could go on, but 10 is a nice round number. The point is that I'm broke & need to lose weight, so I can strip (to get people skills, of course) to learn to people shop & earn the big bucks.
Things will get better, I know, but right now it doesn't feel like it. It's amazing at how quickly the funk can take over. While I'd like to curl up into a little ball & watch Pirates all day, I have to get out of the funk as soon as possible, so I can get some work done & hope the hubby doesn't realize what he's gotten himself into.
I may not be able to people shop, but I can give you a 2 for 1 special.
I always have the best of intentions. I plan on spending time on a blog, looking for a job, doing my online studying, but it seems that something always seems to come up. We have to go to Target, go to the in-laws, we have psycho dogs terrorizing our house, or play on Twitter or Facebook, etc...
Does anything that I had wanted to do get done? No. There are loads of laundry waiting to be done, bathrooms that need to be cleaned & a computer class just calling my name, telling me I need to get my ass in gear. What am I doing? I'm writing instead.
Someone needs to teach me how to make a schedule & stick to it. I want to get everything done, but it always seems that there is something else to do (Damn you, Pirates!)
I am going to make it my goal (for the month) to try to stick to a schedule. I know I will feel like a better person for it.
My goal list for tomorrow:
Study-I want to get through at least 3 chapters (I was gonna say 4, but lets keep it realistic).
Work on this blog to try to make it better
Clean bathrooms
Pirates of the Caribbean (Hey, I must do what is on the list!)
I'm trying to start off small & hopefully I can accomplish these things & work at growing to be a better person. Wish me luck!
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We're broke
